Well, kids, it looks like Danielle is slowly getting launched into the adult world…. I successfully got my own car insurance (thanks to Michael for all his help!!), completed (well almost) my first bank loan on my own, and this Saturday I will have, for the first time, a car in my own name. Not to mention the brand new, enormous debt that comes with all this adult real-worldness…..
Is it weird that I feel a sense of security from having said debt? I’m not sure if it’s simply because (as I mentioned before) I am now in the adult world and this is a confirmation of it? Or because it’s yet another ritual to add to my monthly schedule, something that adds a little structure to my life? Or is it that it’s yet another reason to look toward the future, another goal to work towards, something to focus on? I think it’s more this last reason… I like having focal points way ahead of me, and this is a big one… along with starting at St. Joe’s (short term), graduation (long-term), stuff like that.
So, I think it’s safe to say that I am so totally in love with that feeling of immense relief – the "Whew, thank God that’s over!" along with that sense of pride – that I see even typically "negative" things (such as debt, or cramming my schedule with classes & working fulltime) as just another opportunity to reach that great sensation.. it’s probably one of the best feelings ever, the stuff some of our best memories are made of. There’s no way to reach it without the tough stuff. So bring it on: the boring, the expensive, the time-consuming and the uncomfortable.. not because I am some kind of crazed masochist but because I love to question, control & conquer…. and then, finally, just breathe.
I mean, when you think about it, what else is life about? We need to make something of ourselves- then not only reap the benefits, but bask in the fact that we earned that right.